Now I’m not a huge football fan but I don’t go out of my way to avoid it either so that means that I have been exposed to a fair bit of it over the past couple of weeks, on the telly, on the radio and I was wondering why they have all employed such inexperienced commentators? Well they must be inexperienced mustn’t they when every second thing that they see in Germany is ‘unbelievable’ therefore they can’t possibly have seen it before, unbelievable shot, goal, tackle, pace, save, architecture, refereeing decision, haircut, pass, boot sponsorship deal, stadium, crowd noise, interview, substitution. No they are not, I don’t watch much football and I have seen it all before, you are supposed to be professional foorball commentators so I’m damn sure you’ve seen it before so who is it who removed 95% of your vocabulary before you went out there, whoever it was you need to catch up with them and get it back because you’re sounding like educationally sub-normal goats right now.

In the meantime try; exceptional, remarkable, good, average, ordinary, routine, simple, precise……..I could go on, but what’s the point?

Let’s start that again, I very much like to tell you I told you so, I just don’t know why it is that people insist on denying themselves this particular pleasure? What was it that I told you about previously, (6th May) it was the about the pox of crappy flags that a significant proportion of the motor vehicles sprouted about 6 weeks ago and their likely final resting place. And lo, it has come to pass, I counted 463 (without being significantly distracted from the job in hand you understand) specimens of this tat over the 400 km I travelled on Tuesday, that’s close on 2 a minute and it’s only going to get worse.

The only satisfaction I can possibly get from this littering is if the Cross of St. George has truly become the trade mark of the BNP, then seeing it in the gutter on such a regular basis gives it a little redeeming symbolism.

I really am loath to pin this one on our police service, incompetent in many respects it maybe. It may be on the path to becoming no more than a speed camera servicing agency of the Home Office but even the dimmest of wooden tops, whilst struggling to walk and chew gum at the same time as considering the implications of going mob handed into an area which has a significant ethnic population in order to secure the arrest of two people, must surely reach the conclusion that they must approach the situation by deploying the minimum resource which is commensurate with the perceived threat. So what was that threat perceived to be, I don’t know but I have to give plod the benefit of the doubt and this is where the cultural divergence makes itself evident. If they had arrested two white Anglo Saxon guys, even of impeccable standing, what would have occurred? Nothing by way of Joe Public taking to the cobbles certainly. Newspaper headlines, liberal lawyers would have come crawling out of the woodwork looking for a little profile and pressure for due process to be hastened would have been applied by all and sundry but generally people would have sat back, reasonably confident that the justice system would run it’s course to a conclusion governed solely by the facts of the case put before the court. Yes, I know that sounds a little naïve but I am generalising. If this condition is not accepted by all then we will not have a multicultural society but a ghettoised one in which any police activity requiring more than two officers will require a minimum of twenty in order to be sure of being able to carry out their duties and this will perpetuate and exacerbate any latent victim mentality present in these neighbourhoods.

But going back to giving plod the benefit of the doubt, this is principally because I assume that they were presented with ‘intelligence’ from an external source, and therefore unable to verify it’s substance or parentage, on which they were obliged to act in the name of public safety, with no wiggle room at all. That the ‘intelligence’ was complete bollocks is not their fault in this instance, unless someone in the higher reaches of officialdom has a major agenda. I’ll leave the conspiracy theorists to take it from here.

In the event of ever being diagnosed with said ailment, you are all free to have me put down. Have I got hold of the wrong end of the stick here or don’t we actually have to play a tournament, or something banal like that, in order to find the winner instead of just handing the hardware to England, because that appears to be what a large number of ‘fans’ seem to be expecting to happen. And all this when every rent a quote, mouth on a stick pundit is ambivalent, at best, about our prospects yet Joe Public’s confidence seems in inverse proportion to the supposedly educated guesswork. On further reflection it may be best if the powers that be do hand over the goodies now because of all the natural, and unnatural, disasters faced by the planet, perhaps the worst could be the seismic shock which would occur when the bubble bursts around here.

Oh and would it be possible to curtail the need for a nationally reported press conference to be held every time one of these over paid, overrated and over exposed gob-shites so much as breaks wind in the bath. It does worry me that behind the blanket coverage of Peter Crouch having a hang nail, David Beckham finding a piece of spinach between his teeth or learning that the results of the MRI scan of the zit on John Terry’s arse show it’s not as serious as first thought and he can return to full training in a couple of days, I may have missed something trivial such as Iran commencing their nuclear weapons testing program somewhere in or around Tel Aviv.